“A Nation Of Perverts And Paedophiles” – Femi Fani Kayode

MY MIND SNAPS

Constitution-Ammendment-Yerima-Makes-Senate-Back-Underage-MarriageThe Nigerian Senate includes some of the brightest minds in our country many of whom are friends of mine and most of whom have been in active politics for many years. They have my respect. However what transpired in the Senate chamber a few days ago was a great cause for concern for not just me but millions of Nigerians from all over the world. How an innocent and seemingly uninteresting, uninspiring and unimportant debate about when and at what age a Nigerian citizen could legitimately and lawfully renounce his or her citizenship turned into a referendum on paedophilia and child marriage I don’t know. Yet sadly that is precisely what happened and ever since then the nation has been on fire.

Senator (ex-Governor) Ahmed Sani, the Yerima Bakura and the Apostle of political sharia in Nigeria finally got his way and the futile attempt by a small number of…

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Story Of An Admitted Rapist

The Story Below May Offend The Sensitivities Of Some.

I raped a woman. I do not believe that I am a
pathological sex offender, but all the same, I raped. I
don’t think I am a bad guy. I have a college degree in
the arts from a prestigious school and I get along well
with my parents, who are still married. I do not hate
women or the world, or myself, for that matter. My
female friends, as well as many of my ex-girlfriends,
think I am a bright, caring, understanding person. But
all of that did not keep me from raping.
I did not understand that what I did was rape until
about a year ago. What made me finally recognize my
crime was the recent surge in media cover about date
rape.
I went to a New York City bar, scamming‹ looking of
someone to bed for the night‹ with some of my
friends. We had already been drinking steadily and by
the time we got there, we were still coherent but
basically numb.
Through the entire night, even though I was drinking,
I remained in control of my body. The booze made me
feel invincible, immune to rejection. That night,
whatever I wanted I was going to take, and nothing
was going to stop me.
I met her at the bar. She was from England and had
come to New York for a short time to tour with a
musical revue. When I walked in I knew I wanted to
bed this girl. I wanted to have sex that night, and she
looked like an inviting prospect.
That was a period in my life when I was “slutting”
heavily. I would pick a woman up at a bar and sleep
with her the same night. I started to think I was entitled
to sex. After talking a girl up and buying her a few
drinks, I would do everything I could to make her go to
bed with me. Usually she was willing. Sometimes it took
a little more work to convince her.
She had only recently arrived and did not know much
about the city. We talked for a while and a mild
seduction took place. It was clear she’d been drinking
before I arrived, and we had three or four drinks
together. As the alcohol made her less guarded, I
convinced her that I was interested in what she was
saying and was beginning to really care about her.
Our thighs rubbed together, my arm brushed against
her breast.
I was getting to her. We drank some more and I grew
confident that I was not going home alone that night.
She was staying at a friend’s place downtown, and I
assumed that when we left together, it meant she was
going over to my place.
I always had a secret agenda with women. I would do
anything I could to seduce them. I would use empathy,
understanding, humor, even my deepest secrets to get
them on my side. I would show that I was a sensitive guy
and use that for the sole purpose of bedding them.
This time I used a woman’s drunkenness and
unfamiliarity with the city for my purposes. Once I had
her out of the bar, she had no friends to help her, no one
to call, nowhere to go except where I wanted her to go.
We started walking and she asked, “Where are we
going?” and I said, “Just walking,” knowing that we
were heading in the direction of my apartment. We
would stop sporadically and make out. During one
heavy session, I said to her, “Come back to my place,”
and she refused. I said, “What do you mean, no? This
is New York City. You don’t leave a bar with a guy
and not sleep with him. C’mon, this isn’t England, this
is the big city! This is how we do things.” She still
refused, but I could tell I was influencing her with
that ridiculous line. We walked some more, all the
time getting closer to my apartment, and I used that
line time and time again as I took her through
unfamiliar streets. We reached my apartment and I
asked her if she wanted to come up. She said no, and
I said, “Just come up for a little bit and then I’ll take
you back.” That sat better with her, and I
congratulated myself for the brilliant sell.
We got up to my apartment and I began kissing her,
but now she was not responding like she did on the
street. I asked her, “What’s the matter?” But she just
stared blankly past me. I began to touch her more
aggressively, squeezing her breasts, rubbing the
inside of her thighs. Still no reaction. I felt like I was
fondling a rag doll.
Not that I cared. I did not need any response to get
what I wanted.
I eased her down on the bed. She did not resist me
but moved like dead weight, staring straight ahead
and grinding her teeth furiously. “Christ, what a
repulsive sound,” I said, and I thought maybe she was
trying to turn me off enough so I would stop what I
was doing.
I was not going to stop now. She was half naked on
my bed with no one around. I was going to have this
girl. I began removing her pantyhose and she firmly
crossed her legs.
Grinding her teeth and tensing her body were the
only ways she could safely express her fear. Here
was a girl in a dark apartment with a man she had
never met before who could have easily killed her, in
a city that he had described to her as a moral
vacuum. She did not cry, scream, or fight.
The sex lasted about a minute or two, and when it
was over, I had the familiar aftertaste left by
unsatisfying sex. My coercive power, which had been
so relentless five minutes before, was spent. The
manipulative force I’d used had left me empty.
I did not want this girl sleeping in my bed.
I also did not want to walk her home. She sat up in
bed and said she wanted to leave. By now it was four
AM and I could not let her go out alone, even if she
did know how to get back.
“Just sleep over,” I said reluctantly. “You can leave
when it’s light out.” She did sleep over, and didn’t
stop grinding her teeth through the entire night.
My male friends say they have been in similar situations.
One said, “I feel guilty, but what can you do? You try not
to make the same mistake again.”
Others do not see that what they did was wrong.
Another friend told me, “I did something like that once,
but I don’t think it’s rape. Come on, it’s not like you
forced her to have sex with you.”
But didn’t I force her? What constitutes force? Do I have
to threaten her life? Do I have to physically hurt her as
a way of making her submit?
If I were walking in a dangerous and unfamiliar
neighborhood and a man twice my size walked up to me
on a deserted street and said, “Give me your money,” I
would probably hand it over. I would think, “This guy
could easily kill me. He did not threaten me, but merely
demanded I give him something. I could run, but I would
not know where to go for help. I may lose my money
and feel violated, but it is better than having him kill
me.”
I feel now that the power to rape is still inside me. Now,
when I meet a woman and see that she likes me, I am
very cautious not to make the first move. I will talk to
her, still possibly thinking about being intimate with her,
but I will not seduce. I will not try to pull desire out of
her, whether it is there or not.
Even after she makes the first move, and things
progress to sex (now a matter of days or weeks later,
instead of hours), I am far less aggressive and far more
careful in my actions. Until I understand my own power,
I will not use it. I never want to rape again

Four teenagers rape girl, threaten to kill her-Lagos,Nigeria

The Lagos State Police Command has arrested four
boys for allegedly raping a 14-year-old girl in the Mile
12 area of the state.
PUNCH Metro learnt that the suspects, Wale Badejo,
Jubril Yusuf, Olusanya Remi and Wale Oluwafemi, who
are between the ages 18 and 19, allegedly abducted the
victim on her way to school and took turns raping her.
According to the police, the suspects held the victim for
over seven hours and threatened to kill her if she told
anybody about what happened to her.
A member of the victim’s family, who craved anonymity,
said the incident occurred on May 30, 2013.
She said, “She (the victim) told us that one of the
suspects, who also lived in the area, had been making
sexual advances to her for sometime but she always
rebuffed him. The boy (Oluwafemi) and her friends then
vowed to deal with her, calling her a proud person.
“She schools at Maryland and because of the distance
of the school from home, she leaves home around
6:30am every day.
“On the day of the incident, the boys came on two
motorcycles, grabbed her and took her to Oluwafemi’s
house at Agiliti.
“The boys blindfolded her and stuffed her mouth with
cloth. The boys then took pictures of the barbaric act
and made a video recording which they said they would
upload on Facebook. The boys further threatened to kill
her if she told anybody about what had happened.”
PUNCH Metro learnt that when the victim returned
home, she did not inform her parents about what had
transpired for fear of being killed.
It was learnt that a resident, who had seen the rape
pictures on the phone of one of the suspects, reported
the incident to the victim’s parents.
It was learnt that the victim’s mother immediately
reported the matter to the Ketu Police Division and the
suspects were arrested on June 6.
Our correspondent, who visited the victim’s home on
Dada Street, learnt that the suspects had been accused
of similar offences in the past.
A resident, who craved anonymity said, “The boys have
been accused of raping other girls in the area. They
always get away with it and we hope they will be
prosecuted this time.”
The case, however, took a sudden twist when the
victim’s family said they did not want the case to be
taken to court.
The victim’s mother, Iyabo, said, “The families of the
suspects have been begging us since the incident
occurred and we have decided to let the case go.
“I was pained when I learnt my daughter was raped, but
since we are all neighbours and taking into
consideration the ages of the boys, we believe it is best
to forgive and forget.
“One of the suspects is even an orphan and his 75-year-
old grandmother has pleaded with us. For the sake of
peace, we do not want a case anymore.
“My daughter has been taken to hospital for treatment
and so far, no illness has been found in her blood. She
has also received counselling and she will soon resume
school.”
A police situation report made available to our
correspondent by the police ‘B’ operations department
stated that, “On June 6,2013, the mother of the victim
reported at Mile 12 Police Post that the suspects
conspired and had carnal knowledge of her daughter,
who is 14 years old.
“The mother said around 6.30am, when her daughter
was on her way to school, the suspects grabbed her and
forced her into their room at Dada Street and had sex
with her one after the other. They also threatened to kill
her daughter and throw her into the river if she told her
parents.
“The victim said they blindfolded her and covered her
mouth with cloth. The suspects have confessed and will
be charged to court.”
When contacted on the telephone, the spokesperson for
the state police command, Ngozi Braide, lamented the
rise in cases of rape, adding that parents of victims
usually frustrated efforts of the police.
She said, “We have said it many times in the past that
parents of victims are of the habit of perverting the
course of justice by refusing to cooperate with the
police in prosecuting rape suspects.
“Except members of the public rise up against this, rape
will continue.”

Source-Punch Newspapers

American tourist gang-raped in northern India

Shimla (India) – An American tourist was gang-raped by a group of men in a hill resort in northern India, police said on Tuesday, in what is the latest in a series of rapes .

The attack has once again thrown the spotlight on women’s safety in India.

The woman was picked up by three men in a truck late on Monday while hitch-hiking back to her guest house in the

town of Manali in Himachal Pradesh state, police said.

Three men have been arrested in connection with the alleged attack,

Himachal Pradesh police chief B. Kamal Kumar told Reuters Television in the state capital Shimla.

The woman told police her attackers took her to an isolated area and raped her.

The woman was taken to a local hospital for preliminary tests before being taken back to her guest house, said a

local police inspector, who declined to be identified.

“We are in contact with authorities but due to issues of privacy we have no further comment,’’ Peter Vrooman, spokesman for the U.S. embassy in New Delhi, said in an email.

In March, a Swiss tourist was gang-raped while on a camping trip in a forest in the central state of Madhya Pradesh. In

the same month, a British woman jumped out of her hotel balcony in Uttar Pradesh state to escape a possible sexual assault.

Sex crimes are common in India.

The National Crime Records Bureau says more than 24,200 rapes were reported in India in 2011 one every 20 minutes.

The capital, New Delhi, has the highest number of sex crimes among major cities, with a rape reported on average every 18 hours, according to police figures.

Police are investigating the alleged rape of a 21-year-old Irish woman working as a volunteer with a non-governmental organisation in West Bengal at the weekend.

“Women should observe stringent security precautions, including avoiding use of public transport after dark without

the company of known and trustworthy companions,’’ according to a U.S. State Department travel advisory for India.

The gang rape of a 23-year-old trainee physiotherapist on a bus on Dec. 16 in New Delhi, brought thousands of people onto the streets in protest and clashes with police for days to demand better law enforcement to fight gender crimes. (Reuters/NAN)

An Expose’ On Sex Slavery

Showing a luxurious exterior, expensive cars parked in neat arrangement, well lit environment with heavy set men, patrolling the compound, expensive looking SUV pulls into the compound, security check is done, and the vehicle is ushered into a marked parking spot, See two well dressed men, alight from the vehicle, they chatter excitedly as they walk to the front door.

See a luxurious interior, leather furniture, well stocked bar in the corner, well dressed men, standing around with wine glasses in hand, drinking and talking loudly, waiters and waitresses weaving in and out of the men, ensuring they are all well taken care of.

See a well dressed woman, sitting on a couch, clad with gold necklaces on her neck, and gold rings on her fingers,
See her face, heavily made up, with a smile on her lips, and a wine glass in hand, see 2 men, also well dressed, sitting on opposite sides of her, each with photo albums in hand, see the album, showing different girls, poised in lingerie, See both men smiling as they go through the album, first man points at a picture and shows it to the woman, second man also points to a picture in his album, the woman smiles, gives a thumbs up and talks into an intercom, suddenly two girls in their mid twenties appear, woman points to both of them, and the two girls move to the sides of the two men, the two men look at each other and smile.

See a naked young lady in bed, covered, staring blankly at the ceiling, one of the previous men, quickly undressing and smiling, girl drops condom of the bed, smile fades of the man’s face, man drops extra money on side table, he gets into bed on top of the young lady, See the man’s legs opening the young ladies legs, see the man on top of the young girl under the covers, see the young lady’s face, blank stare, eyes looking at the ceiling, occasional eye twitch. She closes her eyes.

See a cleaner carrying a garbage bag, cleaner walks up to the garbage bin, and empties contents of the garbage bag, see a garbage bag contents, used sanitary towels, opened condom packs, blood stained bed sheets. Cleaner shakes his head and walks away.

See a well dressed woman walking into living room, see different men, well dressed, drinking and talking loudly, they all shout praises as woman walks in with different young ladies, they all immediately begin to mingle, see a well dressed woman, looking around and smiling in content.

A man getting dressed and smiling, he taps the young lady on the shoulder and walks out of the room; young lady sits up on the bed, search her face, a tear rolls down her eyes.

See her life of slavery,Her life of servitude.

Help Stop SexSlavery.

By Arome Ameh (The Priest

Child Prostitution-A Victim’s Story

Hello,

Whenever you feel you have it bad,

Whenever you feel things could be better,

Whenever you feel you aren’t where you feel you should be

Read this story, and be thankful for your situation.

At a first glance, she appears to be in her late 20’s or early 30’s, but LINDA (not her real name) is just a 15 year old girl, she was brought to this women’s shelter a few months ago after being rescued by a concerned citizen, she agreed to give an interview, please note that names and events have been altered to protect her, any similarities are coincidental, also read this story not for entertainment purposes, but for educational and awareness purposes.
HER STORY

My aunt came to see my mother, and told her she would take me to LAGOS, where she would give me work, so I could send money back home to support my mother and her brothers, I know this sounds like an everyday story, and yes you are right, it is an everyday story, because this is what happens every day, the rate of poverty is high, my father died some years ago, and up until now,

we have not been able to get his pension, too many technicalities, so we were left to fend for ourselves, in any way we could, sometimes my mother would fry bean cakes (AKARA), and I would sell some in the market, and around the neighborhood, but unfortunately the price of beans went up, and we couldn’t afford it anymore, so we had to stop, there was no money to even start any petty trade, I and my brothers had to stop school, and most days we would beg for alms just to eat, so you can imagine it was a welcomed relief when my aunt came to offer her assistance.

My mother did not hesitate, and the next day I was off to LAGOS with my aunt, well she wasn’t really my aunt, because we are not related in anyway, it’s just what I call her. We got to LAGOS and she put me in her big supermarket as a sales girl, and I met other girls here too, I was happy and I thought all our problems would be solved, I had this idea that I would work hard, save my salary, and eventually open a shop for myself, and bring my family over to LAGOS, sounded easy in theory, but my dreams where turned into a nightmare.

My aunt came to me one day and asked me to go deliver some things to a customer, unknown to me she had sold me out to a customer for sexual favors, when I got there I met a very old man, he forced himself on me, and raped me, after which he gave me N1, 500 and told me to greet my madam. From that point on, I and the other girls were used as sex slaves, sometimes I slept with as many as 5-7 men daily, it was horrible, many times I tried to run away, but we had been so isolated, we would end up being caught, because we didn’t even know our way around, and she seemed to be very popular , she would beat us like animals after every attempt, and whenever a customer complained we didn’t perform to expectations, she would beat and starve us.

There were different rates for different services,

For normal intercourse- N1, 500 (with condom)-EQV-$6.5

For normal intercourse –N2, 000 (without condom and HIV test proof)-EQV-$13

For anal sex- N3, 000 (with or without condom, but with HIV test proof)-EQV- $20

For oral sex-N1, 000

For just breast feeding –N500

This was what I was subjected to for almost 2years, most days I would just lay there and close my eyes, until they were done, I became a dead person just moving round, I remember I got pregnant and she beat me so badly she broke my nose, she accused me of trying to hook one of my customers so he would marry me, she took me to her doctor, and she removed the pregnancy, and that very day, I slept with 3 men, yes I did, even after the abortion, she was after the money, sometimes she would bring sacks of clothes for us to pick and wear, but I never saw any money, never had a way of contacting my family, it was total isolation.

One day a man came in and asked for a girl to bring his purchases to a hotel not too far from the supermarket, I was asked to do that delivery, and that day was my miracle day, the man was actually the one who brought me to this centre, they had heard of what was going on, and came to investigate, he took me from the hotel and brought me to the shelter.

A few days later, the shelter officials went back to the supermarket to confront my “aunt”, but she denied all the allegations and non of the girls confirmed the stories, I wasn’t surprised at the results, because I told them the conditions we were living in, I am lucky,

I am here and I can tell this story, the girls left there don’t have the courage to do so, because there is no one to protect them.

I can’t leave here yet, the shelter people said she might try to kidnap me from my home in the village if I go back, so they have offered to send someone to my family to explain everything to them, but
I feel very ashamed, how will my mother look at me, if she hears I was a prostitute in LAGOS, but I thank God for saving me from this life, I just got my HIV test result, and it is negative, so at least I survived that.

I am learning how to become a hair dresser, and I hope very soon, I’ll be good enough to get a real job, these things happen, it happened to me, I have seen the bad side of human beings and what they can do to others for money, i hope people will read this story, and believe and also help those that they can.

Well there you have it.

The reality is that there are many more girls out there,most of them if not all are thrust into these situations by their family members,the excuse usually is laid at the door step of poverty.

My question is Who is to be held accountable?

By Arome Ameh (The Priest)

The Cycle of Abuse

angrymanThe domestic violence cycle of abuse diagram helps us to understand the different phases which typically occur in abusive relationships before, during and after an abusive episode.cycle of abuse

Most abusive relationships display adistinct pattern, known as the Cycle of Abuse or Violence. Abuse is rarely constant but alternates between:tension building,acting out, thehoneymoon period and calm.

Not all relationships follow the same cycle, and individual experiences vary, some stages – especially the honeymoon or calm periods, may shorten or be left out completely, especially as the abuse intensifies over a period of time.

Each stage of the cycle can last from a few minutes to a number of months, but within an abusive relationship, the following stages can often be pin-pointed:

TENSION BUILDING –

  • Tension starts and steadily builds
  • Abuser starts to get angry
  • Communication breaks down
  • Victim feels the need to concede to the abuser
  • Tension becomes too much
  • Victim feels uneasy and a need to watch every move

INCIDENT or “Acting Out” phase

  • Any type of abuse occurs
  • Physical
  • Sexual
  • Emotional
  • Or other forms of abuse as found in the power and control wheel.

ONEYMOON or Reconciliation phase

  • Abuser apologizes for abuse, some beg forgiveness or show sorrows
  • Abuser may promise it will never happen again
  • Blames victim for provoking the abuse or denies abuse occurred
  • Minimizing, denying or claiming the abuse wasn’t as bad as victim claims

CALM before the tension starts again.

  • Abuses slow or stop
  • Abuser acts like the abuse never happened
  • Promises made during honeymoon stage may be met
  • Abuser may give gifts to victim
  • Victim believes or wants to believe the abuse is over or the abuser will change

(Often the cycle of violence is portrayed as 3 steps: tensionacting out andhoneymoon phases, where the Honeymoon and Calm phase are seen as one.)

This information is provided courtesy of Kim Eyer of rhiannon3.org