confused man

It took us five years to get pregnant, first two years of our marriage, we spent discovering each other, and making plans, building our home. At first it didn’t bother us, because we thought we had it all planned out, we wanted to be ready before the baby came, so we waited, one year became two years and the three years, and my wife became worried, so did i.

We kept trying the natural way, but nothing happened, and so we decided to visit a doctor and run some tests, and it turned out that I had slow swimmers.

We are advised to try and get pregnant artificially, it was quite expensive but money was no object in matters like this, all that really mattered to me at this point was the stress and pain my wife would go through. We talked about it for a while, and agreed to give it a shot, we were excited.

Our excitement quickly began to fade after the first unsuccessful attempt, but the doctors advised us to keep our spirits high because sometimes you need more than one attempt before it finally takes, and with those words in mind we continued to try, and try, and try again.

We tried for three years, and nothing took. I was devastated, and my wife even more so, but I had to be strong for her, she needed me more than ever at that point and I wasn’t going to allow my disappointment keep me from being there for her, and so with this in mind I began considering other options, options which included adoption and possibly another man, yes another man and don’t you dare judge me if you have never been in such a situation. I was not ready to allow her go through the same almost hellish procedure again, but to my surprise she told me she wanted to give it one more try, and in her own words

“I need to do this one more time, because if I don’t, I’ll never know if that one time I didn’t try would have been the time it finally worked”.

With those words I became helpless, and didn’t have the heart to refuse her request, and so we prepared ourselves for another tedious process of injections, and pills and drains being shoved into my wife, the very thought of it still makes me shudder till this very day.

After a few days, the process was complete, and then the waiting period began, which was the most difficult part because a lot of things went through my mind, things like would it finally work this time, and if it did would she be able to carry the baby to full term, and if she could would the baby be born healthy, and if it was would it need any special care since it was conceived artificially, the questions were endless and this cause me great anxiety, but I had to mask my anxiety in order not to make her anxious, which would cause her more harm than good.

I got home a bit late one night, I had been held up at work and I had called her to tell her I would be a bit late coming home, she sounded fine and told me she had prepared a delicacy for me and that she would wait up for me, this got me excited because I knew what a delicacy meant.

I pulled up at our gate at about 9pm and honked my horn for the gate-man to open up and let me in, but he was nowhere to be found, this was not unusual because the man always had an annoying habit of wondering off and leaving the gate slightly opened without and tangible reason for not being at his post, but I would deal with that later because I had no intention of being upset since I knew what awaited me inside the house. I opened the gate myself, drove in and parked the car. I came out and locked the gate from the inside, so even if he came back he would have to knock and I would have to open up for him and that would be when I would confront him.

The compound was quiet, I tried to strained my ear to hear any sound coming from the main house, but all I heard was silence, I don’t really know why but at this point I became rather tense, and so I slowly walked towards the front door, I tried the lock and it was open, I wondered if she had heard me drive in a quickly unlocked the door, I opened the door and walked in, the lights were off but the TV was on, although the volume was slightly lowered and I noticed some of the chairs were moved slightly out of place and this made me wonder what she was up to.

As I moved through the living room, I called out to her, but I got no reply, so I decided to head upstairs and see if she was there, but not before glancing towards the dining area to see if she had set the table, but the table was bare and so I proceeded up the stairs. I was half way up the stairs, when I felt something wet and sticky on the railings, it felt like soup, but then it didn’t quite register in my head as soup, the lights were still off so I couldn’t really make out what was on my palms.

I got to our bedroom, the door was slightly ajar and the lights were off, I called out to her again, and still got no answer, and so I carefully pushed the door open, and reached for the lights before I fully went in.

When the lights came on, I saw something I will never be able to un see, I saw my wife on the floor, in a pool of blood, with her clothes ripped off, I scanned around the room and it was a mess, everything was scattered everywhere, my eyes went back to the lifeless body of my wife, and I just stood there and stared at her, I was rooted to the spot and all I could hear was the last conversation we had on the phone, that was all I could hear, my brain had been locked in that time period.

Everything was a blur for me, I don’t know who called the police, maybe I did, but I can’t remember anymore and not that I really want to, the police told me it was a robbery gone wrong, they beat her, they raped her and then they killed her, the stabbed the gate-man too, but he was going to make a full recovery.

I tried many times to make sense of the whole situation, but I realized it was driving me crazy because the more I tried to understand it, the crazier it seemed to get, and so I would sit and replay our last conversation in my head and weep, and pray for death to take me too, because that was the only way to ease the pain I was going through.

As the weeks went by after I buried my wife, I went back to work, I just couldn’t stand being idle, I needed to keep my hands and mind busy, but I was just a zombie going through the motions like I had been programmed.

The weeks turned to months, and on one weekend I decided to tidy up her wardrobe because I hadn’t touched anything of hers since the incident, don’t know why I decided to do it, probably because I needed some closure and I needed to convince myself I could move on.

weppin dad

As I opened the wardrobe I immediately smelt her perfume, I became week in the knees but quickly overcame the sensation, I reached into the wardrobe and picked up her handbag, and the first thing I saw was her phone, it had been in there all this while and the battery had run out and so I searched through the bag to get the charger and that’s when I saw a white envelope with a red ribbon and the word surprise written on it. I tore it open and it was a confirmatory test result from the hospital, she was pregnant, it had finally worked, on the back of the result she had written a small note

“Honey I feel so blessed to have you in my life, thank you for being there, and welcome to the first day of the rest of our lives together”

After reading the note, I curled up on the floor, and wept.


Written By Arome Ameh (The Priest)



10 thoughts on “BROKEN MIRRORS

  1. Buki O. says:

    Whyyyyyyyyyyyy? This rotten weaviled beans of life sha. 😦

  2. Adeyemi says:

    Short of words cant really understand why things this Devilish happen,God this Life

  3. Sad indeed! Inexplicable pain!

  4. Vanessa says:

    The tragedies of this life.

  5. doysol says:

    The pain..cannot be imagined.

  6. elsieisy says:

    😦 😦
    This life!

  7. temitope says:

    Awwwww. too sad!

  8. Bunmicake says:

    Noooooooooooooooooo!!! Broke my heart #Sad

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